10 Wedding Traditions Explained

Have you ever wondered why every wedding you've attended has similar traditions or where they come from? Why do bridesmaids all wear the same dress? Why is there a garter toss? Why must the bride and groom feed each other cake?  This is just what we expect at weddings, but have you ever thought of the origins of these customs? Here are 10 traditional wedding customs explained by me:

1. Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue: It is customary for a bride to have a trinket of each of these descriptions on her person while getting married.  They each symbolize something the bride and groom hope for for their marriage together.  The something old represents the past, while the something new represents their future as a couple. A bride is supposed to borrow a special token from someone who is happily married in hopes that their good luck will rub off onto them.  A blue something represents fidelity and love. 
2. Rain on your wedding day: rain on your wedding day can represent fertility and cleansing
3. Wearing a Veil: In ancient Rome, a bride would wear a veil over her face in order to confuse spirits who were jealous of her glee
4. Not seeing each other before the ceremony: This custom is changing.  Some couples choose to have a "first look" photography session before the wedding, but some people stay tried and true to this custom dating back from the time of arranged marriages.  It was believed that the couple should not see each other before marrying so they couldn't change their mind. Sounds an awful lot like the show,  Married at First Sight. 
5. The "Ring Finger": Wedding and engagement rings are worn on the fourth finger of the left hand because it was once believed that that finger had a vein run directly to the heart.
6. Bouquet and Garter Toss: This tradition comes from across the pond in England.  Wedding guests used to try to rip pieces of the dress and bouquet from the bride in order to gain some of her good luck. Brides started tossing their bouquets in order to get away from the crowd.  Now this has become a tradition at most weddings in which a single woman catches the bouquet and then is believed to be the next to marry. 
7. Bridesmaids: Bridesmaids at one point were to dress exactly as the bride on the wedding day to confuse evil spirits.
8. Giving away the bride: This tradition also comes from the days of arranged marriages.  It was believed that a daughter was property of her father until she was literally given away to the man she was to marry. 
9. Feeding of the cake: In Christian weddings, feeding each other wedding cake represents giving everything they have and caring for one another. 
10. Throwing rice: This common practice represents the guests showering the newlyweds with abundance and fertility.  

If you think some of these are weird traditions we've carried on for years, wait until you see what some traditions from other cultures are:

Easy Etiquette Tips for Guests

This summer while interning at a wedding & special events venue I had the opportunity to work tons of events and interact with tons of guests.  Some of these guests were the nicest most considerate people and others were not.  I was surprised to see how many people didn't understand the common etiquettes of being a guest at someone's wedding. Here are some helpful tips for anyone whose recently sent in that response card.

• Don't wear white.  This is pretty obvious but still some people just don't get it.
• Don't assume you can bring a plus one.  If the invitation doesn't state your name and "guest", but you feel uncomfortable attending the wedding alone, reach out to the couple and ask if you can bring someone.  This is a better alternative than just showing up with someone the bride and groom did not invite.
• Don't assume kids are invited.  Unless the invitation has the children's names or says "and family" hire a babysitter and enjoy your night out alone. 
• Don't bring a large gift. The last thing the couple wants to be doing after the wedding reception is wrangling a bunch of gifts into the back of their car to deal with before the honeymoon.  Save yourself and them the trouble, ship the gift directly to their home.
• Do be on time. Plan ahead.  The couple invited you to their wedding so you could witness their ceremony. If some unforeseeable incident occurs that causes you to be late, don't interrupt.  Wait until they're done and then join in for the rest of the party. 
• Do turn off your cell phone. Nobody wants to be that person who ruins the most memorable moment of someone's life.  Just turn it off. 
• Do congratulate the family.  Even if you've never met them or don't know them very well, introduce yourself. A simple congratulations, a thank you and compliment about the day can go a long way in the eyes of a parent.
• Do keep conversations short. You want to say hello and talk to the bride and groom on their special day, but don't talk forever.  There will be lots of people they need to get around to as well. 
• Do take your favor.  The bridal party and family put a lot of time and thought into those parting gifts so make sure you don't leave yours behind. 
• Don't get wasted. Once again, don't be that person. Just because there's an open bar does not mean that you need to drink the whole bar. 

In addition to these ceremony and reception do's and don't's, there are etiquette rules for social media.

• Don't post a photo of bride until she's officially married
• Don't use your cellphone during the ceremony, leave these photos to the professional photographer they hired.  Cellphones and photos can be distracting to the couple as well as other guests
• Don't congratulate the couple on social media until they've personally announced their marriage on that social media platform 

Bachelors and Bachelorettes Wed

Every Monday night over 5 million viewers sit down in front of their television with their glass of Pinot Grigio to watch what is one of America's favorite and longest reality television shows.  The Bachelor and the spin-off The Bachelorette has created many invested fans (both women and men).  At the end of every season, viewers expect a ring and engagement and are seriously disappointed when it doesn't happen (I'm talking to you, Juan Pablo!).  Since fans see the entire relationship unfold from their first meeting to their happy engagement, some couples have chosen to televise their wedding.

Trista Rehn was the runner up from Season 1 of The Bachelor and was named the first Bachelorette.  She married Ryan Sutter on television on December 6, 2003. This was broadcast over a three episode series called Trista & Ryan's Wedding. According to sources, they were paid 1 million dollars by ABC for allowing them to televise the anticipated event.  The mini-series drew over 26 million viewers, making it one of the most viewed reality episodes of all time. 

Most recently, Sean Lowe and Catherine Giudici tied the knot at the beginning of 2014.  Sean became fan favorite during the eighth season of The Bachelorette and won the spot of The Bachelor by a landslide for season 17.  Their wedding was also televised, but this time ABC put a new spin on it: their wedding would be shown LIVE. Lowe says, "The Bachelor is such a cool experience because people at home feel like they know us and they're invested in our relationship.  We have no problem sharing the actual wedding with everyone who has been with us so far."

Because these couples from the past have chosen to publicize their wedding on television for fans, currently engaged Bachelor/Bachelorette couples are feeling the pressure to do the same. Currently all eyes are on engaged couples, Desiree Hartsock and Chris Siegfried and Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray. They were both seen at New York Bridal Fashion Week last weekend so of course wedding buzz is following them.  My main question for this blog post is: Where do they draw the line? Are they going to let ABC start filming the birth of their children? Are there going to be spinoff shows to follow them around in their life? 

Although I am one of these viewers deeply invested and I completely appreciate the fact that they televise their weddings, they're normal people too? Do they not want their privacy even a little bit?

Would you tune into Andi Dorfman & Josh Murray's wedding?

You Don't Need the Big Bling

New research suggests the bigger the diamond the bigger the divorce rate. So stop dropping hints to your boyfriend with pictures of that $14,000 Harry Winston designer ring. You know the one!
A recent study by Economics professors at Emory University has caught a lot of attention in the wedding world.  The professors surveyed 3,000 adults who are or have been married at some point in their lives.  The study concluded two main findings:

1. A man who spent $2,000 to $4,000 on an engagement ring is 1.3 times more likely to have their marriage end in divorce than a man who spent between $500 and $2,000.
2. Also spending too little on an engagement ring has caused backfire for divorce rates.  Those spending less than $500 on a ring experience higher divorce rates.

The professors of the study suggest a correlation between the high cost of an engagement ring and divorce is because of financial stress placed upon the couple. The wedding industry is often to blame for creating a new standard of wedding expectations and stress for a bride and groom.  These standards pressure to spend even when the finances aren't there.  In the study, researchers say, "Prior to World War II, in Western countries, only 10 percent of engagement rings contained a diamond.  By the end of the century, about 80 percent did.  In 2012, total expenditures on diamond rings were roughly $7 billion in the United States." 

Bridal Fashion Week turned Disney Princess

If you were in New York at all this past weekend, you were probably seeing lots and lots of white along with multiple things borrowed and blue.  Last night wrapped up New York Bridal Fashion Week.  With over 150 designers exhibiting their new lines for 2015, there were plenty of shows to attend. Power-house designers like Amalia Carrera and Betsey Johnson were just two designers who showed off their newest couture, but one dress specifically sent a chill down my spine. 

Photo: Daily Mail UK

Photo: Daily Mail UK

Bridal designer, Alfred Angelo for Disney, created a wedding gown inspired by Elsa from Disney's movie Frozen.  There is no doubt that the movie Frozen has a large fan base.  Last year it became the highest-grossing animated film of all time with over $400,000,000 in box office sales, not to mention all DVD, soundtrack, and licensed products. Millions of people love Frozen but would you want to represent that on your wedding day?  I guess we will see come January 2015 when the dress goes on sale.  In addition to the Elsa dress, Angelo is debuting eight other dresses inspired by Disney princesses including Princess Tiana and Snow White.